Red Sox Acquire My Long-Time Nemesis, Paul Byrd

I was having a great day today feasting on raw meat and playing at the Bark Park.  Then I checked my email and, to my amazement, saw that the Sox had acquired my long-time nemesis Paul Byrd.  Now I have hated Paul Byrd ever since the first day I saw him, perched on a branch in my backyard, nibbling on some sort of seed.  He flew away, but being a birddog and able hunter, I vowed to someday catch this creature.  And then I saw him pitch in the '07 Playoffs and realized that he throws like a turkey, even though he is actually some sort of large water fowl.  Soon after, word came out that he got caught taking HgH.  No wonder he was too fast for me to catch!

And now he's on the Red Sox.  Being a Sox fan, I guess I have to welcome him to our team.  In fact, I'd like to invite him over for dinner if he's interested.  And I'd like to offer him some advice as he joins our team.  Lay low, Paul Byrd.  The Red Sox are like a bird-hunting All-Star team.  Timlin, Beckett, Papelbon.  It's like birds have no chance.  One thing is for sure, I'll be intently watching every single pitch Paul Byrd throws the rest of the season, occasionally licking my TV. Paul Byrd in a Red Sox uniform, feathers and all.  I never thought I would see the day.

 
                         Byrd-Hunting

-Big Pupi