Cheese Pirates Plan “Talk Like a Pirate Day” Pillage
While all you stupid humans are busy talking like pirates today, the actual Cheese Pirates will be busy plundering your various cocktail parties and such.
1:07 PM- Baby shower on Clark St.
2:13 PM- Dean’s reception on North Michigan
3:02 PM- Office hors d’oeuvres on Randolph
3:30 PM- Nacho vendor on Addison
3:47 PM- Pee break
3:48 PM- Yacht kitchen- Monroe Harbor
4:32 PM- Subway sandwich shop on LaSalle
5:31 PM- Wedding at the Planetarium
6:02 PM- Sox-Jays party on Washington
7:05 PM- Berry Chill break
8:07 PM- Dumpter at the Melting Pot
You may be wondering, “why would the Cheese Pirates publish their pillage schedule for the authorities to see?” Well to you we say try and catch us! Isn’t the essence of being a Pirate being brazen?
Note to the Red Sox: Keep in mind it is talk like a pirate day, not play like a Pirate day.