Things to Trade Julio Lugo For
The trade deadline is coming up in 6 weeks and Julio Lugo is on the meat chopping block. Lugo has 15 RBIs, half of which came on sacrifices. He has got to go. Ever since minor leaguer John Odom was traded for 10 maple wood bats, I’ve been thinking about some cool stuff the Red Sox could get for Lugo. Here’s my list of things we should trade Julio Lugo for:
-Some pants that fit Manny
-A Lightweight Stalker .270 Winchester hunting rifle for Mike Timlin
-New necklaces for Dustin Pedroia
-A log of Copenhagen for Tito
-10 loaves of Yaz Bread
-A bucket of KFC Smoky Chipotle Crispy for Kevin Millar
-A bucket of KFC Smoky Chipotle Crispy for me (I should be compensated for having to watch Lugo play SS for this long!)
-Beer for everyone in the bleachers (Other Red Sox fans should be compensated too)
-A petting zoo for the bullpen
-Chuck E. Cheese gift certificates
-12 boxes of Bazooka Joe
-10 Mo-Licious sandwiches for David Ortiz
-Liposuction for Bartolo Colon
-Vocab lessons for RemDawg
That’s some pretty good stuff that we could get for Lugo! Let me know if anyone else has ideas and I will submit the final list to Theo by the trade deadline.
Feast hard,
Big Pupi
mlblogsbigpupi
Hi Pupi,
I wonder if Dustin Pedroia would consider wearing one of my necklaces. My human buys them at the animal shelter where he volunteers, and I have lots of extras. They come in lots of different colors and they are elastic so they don’t get too tight. They even have a fitting to hold a tag with your name and phone number.
I don’t have my own e-mail address, or I would get that put onto my tag too. I can’t have an e-mail address because I ruined our mouse.
Lugo is sure getting to be unpopular in lots of forums such as Baseball Fever. Of course, bad things are also being said about Mike Timlin, Hideki Okajima, Craig Hansen, Javier Lopez, and Manny Delcarmen. And some were even complaining about Jonathan Papelbon because he gave up the game-tying homer to Cincinnati. They stopped complaining when the Red Sox won the game in extra innnings, and Pap was even declared the winning pitcher.
Eleanor
I’d donate Lugo’s salary to the Jimmy Fund or for some paint for the Pesky Pole.
After the 2 errors in one inning tonight I wouldn’t trade him – I would just give him away! It would be nice to get SOMETHING for him, but let’s be realistic!
Emmet
Guess I spoke too soon – looks like he just redeemed himself with a home run. Maybe we could get a few loaves of Yaz bread for him.
Emmet
Too bad, he’s never once gotten a hit when it mattered, maybe we can get a few moldy loaves of Yaz bread for him, but that’s about it I think.
Pupi
Sorry, I missed this blog — hysterical (but sadly true) — I would have added a few things like: an electronic shocker to shock Lugo every-time he calls for a late timeout — oh yea, wait, we won’t need that after the trade, — well he can keep that even though that is what I am suggesting we should trade him for, cause to come out with nothing is still a net positive in this particular case.
Dave
Hi Big Pupi,
How about a pack of Baseball cards or some whiskey, julio lugo is lame, bartender I need another drink!
Fan in pain!
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