Breaking News: Yankee Stadium Squirrel Video-Taping Signs
My blogging about the Yankee Stadium Squirrel has spawned a number of responses from others who despise this dirty rodent. A concerned Massachusetts citizen warned me that this squirrel may have been hired by the Yankees to videotape and steal the other team’s signs from the right-field foul pole. I thought this suspicion may have some merit, as the Yankees are undefeated when the squirrel appears. I analyzed the surveillance video of the bushy-tailed enemy of Red Sox Nation, and I made a shocking discovery:
I want to assure all of Red Sox Nation, as well as fans of other teams trying to catch the Yankees, that the Stadium Squirrel’s days are numbered and SquirrelGate will soon be over. I have traveled to NYC and I have the scent of the squirrel. It is only a matter of time before I catch this rodent. I also enlisted the help of my idol Kevin Millar, who happens to be playing at Yankee Stadium the next two days. Millar informed me that he will attempt to hit a rocket laser shot off the top of the right field foul pole to kill the Stadium Squirrel.